My husband periodically
asks the question, “How long have you been writing that novel?”
I find it difficult to
comprehend that he thinks I’ve spent all of these years writing ONE novel! But
people who aren’t writers have difficulty understanding writers. Sometimes I’m
not sure writers understand other writers and how they work—or even themselves
because they are too close to look at things objectively.
I should count how many
notebooks I have because I have at least one notebook for each novel (more than
100, I’m sure). And probably a couple thousand file folders (at least) on
shelves, in a filing cabinet and in boxes for short stories or research for
other novels not started. I’m great at starting novels. And not too shabby at
creating titles.
Which of my novels
really stands out?
1.)
A young
girl and her grandmother face the old woman’s advancing age and dementia.
2.) A hot, steamy romance between two
people when westward expansion crossed the Allegheny Mountains into Ohio
Country.
3.) A special agent can’t forget the
bullying her brother and she suffered when they were growing up. She vowed to
defend and protect women and their children who have been exploited by men and
society.
4.) Ramblings…the lives of women from their
perspectives rather than men’s interpretations of the women’s worth.
5.) The romance between two people who have
never held each other close, never kissed—or even held hands. But the bond
between them is impossible to sever.
They are soulmates from the edge of Eternity and back again.
My eldest daughter
wants me to finish the story about the girl and her grandmother. So I went to
the top of the garage looking for the box that held that manuscript. OK. I sent
said daughter up to get it for me. I have it in my office.
#2 is the one I would
have finished had I not started college to become an educator more years ago
that I want to admit to you.
#3 is the story about
bullying. Bullying doesn’t come from outside the family only.
#4 was my college
thesis.
#5 is a love triangle…or
can it have four sides?
And these aren’t the
only novels I have begun. Why aren’t they finished?
Procrastination?
Fear?
Don’t know where to
take the story to conclude it?
Well. For a long time I
got interrupted every 10 minutes or so and the habit formed. If I was going to
be pulled from the train of my thoughts there wasn’t much point in starting the
journey, was there? But when the last child moved out I began to change my
habit, not without some resistance. Now, when I start to stand up and walk away
from my desk I tell my Self, “Self, plant your behind in that chair and don’t
you DARE walk away until you’ve accomplished something with this WIP.”
My friend, Jay, said I
am afraid to write because I’m afraid I will fail…or succeed. I’ve been
published before. Not to the degree I desire, but I have been published. I’m
not afraid to write, witnessed by the piles of files and boxes of notebooks and
journals in just this one room! Not counting all the others in other rooms.
Don’t know how to
conclude the story. Before a novel is started in the writing phase, it has to
be thought out. How many times has Maureen said, “Most of the writing is done
in your head. It percolates there while you’re doing other things”?
But, but, but…I just
read that the human brain cannot multi-task efficiently.
Patti says, “Writers
don’t work on just one story or project at a time.”
Cindy said I shouldn’t
charge more than a dime for a copy of my weekly newspaper 13 years ago and Evan
told her why she was wrong.
And somewhere inside my
head I’m aware that doors have been slammed in my face because I didn’t measure
up to what others expected from me.
So I have to make a
choice: Will I give up and give in because the powers that be in this small
spot on the globe bully me to prevent me achieving what they can never hope to
achieve? Or will I surmount the impossible odds that challenge me?
Watch for my name! The
day IS coming!
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